Introvert's Guide to 'Small Talk'
WHAT WILL I DO THERE?...... WHAT WILL I TALK ABOUT?......I DON'T KNOW ANYONE THERE!!
If you find yourself saying these things before going to a social gathering, and your mind constantly screams ‘stranger danger’, chances are that you have 'Introvertism’.
With this very common personality trait comes struggle. Struggle of meeting people, struggle of surviving in a crowd, struggle of being visible, struggle of getting out of the house, or simply the struggle of saying hi to a stranger.
By definition introvert is someone who dislikes huge crowds and often regrets trying to meet new people. It can also be an individual's long lost interest of communicating with people just for the sake of making small talk... (Yes, this is my definition)
If you are an introvert all you need is a few guidelines on how to get talking to a stranger.
The magic trick here is making small talk!! What is small talk?
Small talk is defined as any conversation that takes place just for the sake of avoiding awkwardness, but often leads to delayed awkwardness!!! Small talk is generally so small that you don't need just one but several topics for back up. You can also use one topic for various strangers, just not at the same time.
Spoiler Alert: Making small talk will put your brain in overdrive mode, because you will be thinking about topics constantly.
So in this article I'm going to give you some super helpful and super easy guidelines to take that dreadful step of approaching a potential stranger (don't worry anymore, I have got your backs)
1. Browse and pick
Step one, carefully look at the people and observe them. Try to analyze similarities between you and your prospective stranger. Once you decide, think about a conversation you can have based on the similarities.
2. Approach your stranger
So you can't just go to people and start talking. I mean extroverts do that but in the world of introverts, it is a crime. So the best way is to sit near them. Or stand nearby. Proximity is very crucial here. You can also take help from a common friend and get introduced.
3. Never start with a “Hi”!
Yeah!! It's just boring and what will you say after that?? So ditch the age old hi, hello and how are you, which will fetch you nothing. Start with a question instead. Like if you are a new student then ask for directions or the time table, if you are a mom meeting other moms at a park then ask about child development, if you are stuck at a wedding with a stranger to mingle with ask about their relationship with the couple.
Some other questions that might come handy are, “Are you new here? Do you know how long will this event take? Nice dress, where did you buy it? What do you do? Where do you work?”… (Rack your brain for more of these, and share with me as well😝). Also my go to question is about the weather; that will bring you a conversation for sure!!
4. Smile your conversation away.
If you don't get to pick your stranger and a stranger picks you to talk then keep smiling!! If it's a lady, compliment them in any way possible, if it's a man, talk about traffic or global warming!! And when things get awkward bring the smile back. If there is no more talking, make a gracious exit. “It was nice to meet you” or “I will see you around” has always worked for me as an exit line.
Find out if you are an introvert or not with this quiz! 👍
All things apart, let me tell you one thing. It does not matter if you are an introvert. Introverts and extroverts are two sides of the same society. Even though, extroverts are in demand and they take on the world with their charm, introverts are the people who choose self over society. Also, research says that introverts achieve far more than extroverts. So hey beautiful self aware people, put your introvert swag on and get achieving!
If you are the master of 'Small Talk', feel free to share your knowledge in the comment section below. 😊